Last month I began sharing my journey to get fit by my 40th birthday in November. You can see how I did here. Another month has gone by and it’s time to come clean. I’ll break down the results but the numbers don’t tell what’s behind them and that honestly it’s hard. It’s hard to plan and make good choices, it’s hard to stay away from foods that I enjoy because I have the bigger picture in mind, it’s hard to incorporate activity which I’ve begun to do this month. It’s hard to do the right thing for dinner when I’m exhausted at the end of the day. It’s hard to go to the gym in the evenings when I just want to put my feet up and watch The Voice. I’m not saying this to complain, but this is a frank journey and I’m not going to pretend it’s rainbows and happy bunnies. However, most things worth having are not easy.
Hard as it’s been some days here’s what’s keeping me motivated: My clothes are fitting so much better. I can see that I’m smaller in the mirror. Even though I still get tired because I’m still pretty overweight I have more energy than I have in a long time. My kids are feeling lighter when I carry them. Why? Because I’m getting stronger. There’s not as much of a tightness in my chest when I climb stairs because I’m not carrying as much weight. These are real things that let me know that even though it’s hard it’s worth it and saving my own life is working. Not fitting into a pair of pants but saving my own life.
Drumroll….over the last 4 weeks I have lost another 5.8 pounds! A nice continual slow and steady drop. Some weeks were better than others but I just kept putting one foot in front of the other. If you are on this journey with me, that’s what I encourage you to do. Make up your mind that you are a finisher. That’s what I’ve done. Realize it’s a marathon and not a sprint and there’s always bumps in the road on long journeys.
I’ve incorporated activity for the first time in years. I have hired a trainer for a few sessions and even though I wanted to curl into the fetal position the day after the first session, once I got past that he awakened a competitive side of me that has been dormant too long. I surprised him and I guess I surprised myself too.
When I want to quit and it physically hurts which it often does I find that fire in my belly, the strength I know I have from birthing 2 babies, the strength I know I have from beating post partum depression, the strength I know I have from fighting for special needs little guy. As I fought to hold the plank, as I pushed just a little harder those last few minutes on the rowing machine when my arms and legs were screaming, I knew the planets had shifted and a change had happened in me. I didn’t cry even though I wanted to as he said “You go! There’s a fighter in there!” Damn right.
2 Month Total: 10.8 pounds gone. I will update next month and also share some of my workout which is totally something that can be done at home which I have started doing myself…because my little red head has decided she doesn’t like the gym kid’s club. More on that later. Just remember you’re a finisher and small changes add up to big results.